Updated: Mar 15
I’ve been mentored and coached for the past 11 months and the internal changes have been incredibly significant.
I’ve gained a huge amount of insight and developed self-leadership that my parents never were able to give me.
My first 3 months were extremely transformative, sometimes painful. It took me about 3-4 months to really start noticing some exciting changes both in my thinking, my attitude and also the level of self-love I was able to give myself. Just like working on our fitness and our bodies, the changes aren’t immediately visible and even though we change quite quickly, it’s hard to notice it whilst you’re in the midst of it.
My external transformation hasn’t been as I expected or wished for. I came across a lot of resistance in myself, a lot of challenges and doubts. However, internally the changes have been significant, something I couldn't have done by myself. I would’ve given up many times.
What’s extremely useful about having a mentor/coach is that you receive knowledge in the right order. What I mean is that there are incredible podcasts, lectures and videos out there that anyone has access to. However we struggle to absorb the nutrients from these, since we haven’t yet got the wisdom for them. They don’t land. We feel like we are doing something “productive” but it’s purely overconsumption, just like binge eating. It gives us a high, a certain significance like we are moving forward, however for me and many others this can be an easy way to avoid important responsibilities. With a mentor, you receive the relevant knowledge at the right time and he/she will make sure that it all lands well.
I’ve been part of different coaching systems, programs and group programs. None of these have given me the love and attention that Lighthouse has. Something in me just lit up from the very beginning. Now I know it was my conscience. My heart and spirit knew I was given true attention which was hard to grasp and believe at first. Hence why I invested in myself, which back then was the biggest and scariest decision of my life.
I’d say that the most important change for me has been the ability to recognise ways I am not loving myself, and by doing so, open up new doors of self-love. This allowed me to see the world in a very different way, from a new lens. This way I’m able to love others and appreciate them far, far more.
My ability to question my version of the world has improved, and by recognising the narcissistic traits in my personality, I’ve been able to recreate and rewrite my map of the world, which I continue on a daily basis. This has brought me closer to the truth, which includes a lot of pain and suffering. As sad or horrible as that sounds, it allowed me to become the happiest I’ve ever been. I’ve realised how much I’ve lied to myself and thought I was a happy person, and even though I’ve lived a stress-free life, I did not want to accept or admit the evil that exists in our world. By coming closer to the truth and reality itself, I feel like I’ve come out of a personal bubble in which I spent the past few years in. I used to live in an isolated, mental bubble that helped me to understand the world how I wanted, which couldn’t have been further from the truth.
It has been a bumpy ride, with lots and lots of challenges. There is no quick fix, or quick solution. Your willingness to suffer and to question yourself will determine the speed of your progress.