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Lighthouse International's Paul Stephen Waugh Answers: What is a Win-Win, First-Class Relationship?

Updated: Feb 10, 2022

Head Mentor, Paul Stephen Waugh, contrasts the symptoms of destructive “relationships” with what constitutes and characterises the real peak state interactions that we deserve to be seeking for ourselves and with others.

Written by Vivienne Juan, Associate Elect


“The first thing I remember feeling was how much he cared, knowing that I had met someone who had my best interests at heart.” ~Zach Jones

For an insight into the win-win first-class relationships developed and nurtured at Lighthouse, have a read of Zach’s experience of building trust with his mentor.


You can learn about Lighthouse International Group’s 18 years of pioneering research in relationships on our main website, and find out more on mentorship on our mentoring and coaching page. For inspirational videos, quotes, and other content, follow us on social media.


Have a question? To send me feedback or share your thoughts,

please do get in touch and drop me an email - I'll be happy to hear from you.


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jatindersingh4
jatindersingh4
Mar 19, 2022

Thanks Viv - true win/win is so much more than giving and getting! It’s mental, emotional and spiritua.

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simonperreira
simonperreira
Jan 01, 2022

The ability to seek and build a first class relationship is crucial. It's not always easy and there are times when you are challenged and held accountable, but ultimately why would you not want a relationship with someone who truly and deeply cares for you?

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Vivienne
Vivienne
Jan 26, 2022
Replying to

Absolutely, Simon! To answer your question, when I think of past relationships, I see people who have simply fed me what I wanted to see/hear about myself, to make me feel better... Or those people who didn't say anything - either too scared to confront me, or too scared I wouldn't be able to handle it! Meanwhile the first-class relationships we're building encourage in ourselves and each other the mature balance of both courage and consideration to risk confrontation, and to support the other person with empathy, knowing that together we will grow through it no matter what x

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Cheers for sharing Viv. Win/win relationships or no deal is powerful. Are these relationships righteous? Are they healthy? Two questions that immediately sprang to mind along with questioning the intention, i.e. is it self serving, a win/lose.

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Vivienne
Vivienne
Jan 26, 2022
Replying to

You're so right, Duane! But how often do we ask ourselves these questions? Close to never, right? Because the ego will want to hide from how unrighteous or unhealthy they might turn out to be, and rather live in wilful ignorance of it... First-class relationships are win-win and altruistic rather than self-serving if only for the fact that we will ask each other those questions when we are to fearful to ask ourselves, and that accountability is true care x

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Jai Singh
Jai Singh
Dec 31, 2021

Thanks Viv. "No one cares what you say until they know how much you care" came to mind. Thank you

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Sukh Singh
Sukh Singh
Dec 31, 2021

Yes! My goodness, I never ever in my life knew what it takes to actually build a win win relationship. It's hard!! It's not easy, and definitely not something you can cut and paste from a personal development book. It takes brutal honesty at times, incredible levels of humility... hmm and I am only just scratching the surface, I'm learning to learn how to build win-win relationships that last a lifetime. And if it can't be win-win I know first hand that it must be a no-deal. I'm getting this lesson after 10 years... if it's not win-win, it's not healthy for you or for them! Personal life and professional...

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Vivienne
Vivienne
Jan 26, 2022
Replying to

As simple and as complex as that, huh? It's a tough lesson to learn, but if we don't feel like we can openly search our hearts and bare them in front of those who we purport to have a "good relationship" with, then who are we really kidding? And yeah, you want to be real and be shown real in life and business - I can't imagine any scenario where having layers of lies would be preferable for any reason! Cheers for building on this, Sukhs x

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